Eastern Agency on Aging: Editorial Page

A story of Self Advocacy

A couple of months ago I wrote about my husband’s mother, Marie, who had to move to Maine from Arizona when her husband/caregiver passed away unexpectedly. I’d like to continue the story because I think it helps to hear how others solve problems. And if it motivates anyone to ask for more than just what’s prescribed in their care setting, then my story is worth writing.

Fortunately, my husband and I have been able to incorporate Marie’s needs into our lifestyle and things are going pretty well. Because she has sufficient resources in the way of income and long-term care and health insurance, there are no financial issues. But there have been many significant health care issues, which run the course from where do we find Tucks to “hospice or no hospice.”

Marie came to Maine and enrolled in hospice, having no diagnosis other than failure to thrive. She also had a condition that required fluid to be removed from her stomach regularly.

Little did we know that because she was in hospice, she couldn’t be admitted to the hospital for that procedure, as it was not associated with her “diagnosis.” So, shortly after coming to Maine she had to withdraw from hospice in order to be admitted to the hospital for the procedure.

On an average of every ten days, Marie had to go through the hospital emergency room process in order to be admitted. She had to be transported by ambulance because she is bedridden in a second floor room. Routinely, EMTs had to pick up and return Marie after her stay the hospital. This went on for many visits. Marie was getting tired.

She continually asked me if we could just get someone to come to her room to do the procedure. I, of course, answered no. “There is no way anyone could do this in your room,” I explained.

“There are very few doctors who even make house calls, never mind perform hospital level procedures in a home.”

I even went so far as to ask the assessing nurse to set Marie straight once and for all and to inform her in no uncertain terms that she could either continue living in her current setting and have the ambulance staff carrying her up and down the stairs every 10 days, or she could consider a nursing facility because there was never going to be a doctor that would come to her room and do that procedure!

Sometimes being too sure of yourself doesn’t pay off.

One day a doctor from the hospital called and told me that if Marie were to rejoin hospice, he would be willing to come to her apartment and do the procedure on a volunteer basis! She had suggested it to him and, he, after considering it and double checking with his insurer, agreed to do it. He had the equipment shipped to her home. Now he comes, sometimes after work and sometimes before work, every 7-8 days.

This has been such a gift to our family I cannot even describe how grateful we feel. And I have learned to never say never.

The set-up is a gift to Marie as well. Her anxiety and stress levels have been significantly reduced and she has a newfound confidence in healthcare providers. And best of all, she and the rest of the family has been given back some hope, which is invaluable. Marie’s new relationship with her doctor has educated all of us on the value of asking for what you need, even in the face of naysayers. Being vocal may not always work, but it is worth a try and you never know.

Now, we don’t know if this doctor is the forerunner of new concepts in physician care or if he is just an angel. But the lesson in all this is, thinking about what would work best for you and then letting your healthcare professionals know, can reap its own rewards.

I would venture to say that there are probably more doctors like this than we know about, but they won’t help you if you don’t ask. And who knows, the person you talk to may just be the one to make it happen.

If there is something you don’t understand about your care or your family member’s care, be sure to ask the people who are working with you. If you are a stressed family member and cannot get a straight answer from anyone, contact Eastern Agency on Aging and our Family Caregiver Program.

I know it has helped us to be able to share stories and learn about the options that my husband and I needed to consider for his mother.

If you have a story like this, we would love to hear from you and have the ability to share it with many.

Advancing the Mission of Meals for ME, the Nutrition Program of the Eastern Agency on Aging

Autumn is in the air. As temperatures dipped into the 40s for the lows last month, we all know what’s coming our way. In fact, EAA’s intake office has already received calls about fuel assistance. And we are here to help with that need.

But the topic of this article is Nutrition and EAA’s Meals for ME program. It is our largest and one of our oldest programs. While you may be familiar with the program, let’s test your knowledge.

1. The program is only about food for low-income elderly.

NOT TRUE. This is not the purpose of the program and in fact, qualification to participate has nothing to do with low income. Yes, if we had waiting lists, we would have to give priority to those who needed it most, but there are no income requirements for this program.

If you are age 60 or older, you automatically qualify to have lunch in one of our 48 community dining rooms, as does your spouse regardless of age.

All we ask is that you contribute a portion of the full cost of the meal.

If you are at least 60 or disabled, unable to cook, have no way to provide yourself with a meal, can not leave your home without assistance, you probably qualify for home delivered meals.

The suggested donation is $3.00. However, you may eat at any of our community dining rooms no matter what your age if you pay for the full price of the meal.

2. Meals must be eaten at the dining rooms.

NOT TRUE. In fact, Meals for ME provides “take out” but you must make a reservation AND pay the full price of the meal which is $5.00. Per the federal regulations, meals offered at the donation level are only for those who participate in the group dining setting.

3. Meals for ME is a federal program and therefore does not really need money.

NOT TRUE. Eastern Agency on Aging has never received enough federal and state money to provide meals everyone who wants or needs it.

Meals for ME provides life support in the form of home delivered meals, and life improving options like socialization and education in the form of community dining.

EAA is dependent upon the donations from everyone who dines with us, whether home delivery client, dining room participant or volunteer.

On average, we cannot produce, package and deliver these meals to you without at least an average of a $3.00 donation from each and every person. Every dollar of every Meals for ME donation is put back into the Meals for ME program.

Those of you who donate more than the $3.00 are helping people who simply can not donate yet desperately need the meal. And for that, we thank you.

Just like every other consumer, Eastern Agency on Aging must also pay constantly rising prices for food and paper goods, which is a huge part of the program budget.

Because of Eastern Agency on Aging’s rural nature, the current cost of producing and distributing a meal averages a little over $6.00.

Not only do we depend on donations, we are extremely reliant upon the volunteers who coordinate our dining rooms, deliver meals to our homebound disabled and elderly and the multitudes of other tasks they do.

Do you want to do something really meaningful? Trust me when I say we need you and there is a volunteer opportunity in the meals program near you. Just give us a call.

On another note:

In order to make the program more cost effective, beginning in September, we are phasing out our Bangor Kitchen and will begin purchasing meals from Jeanie Marshal Foods of Bangor.

Jeanie Marshal has already been providing the meals for Lincoln and Newport with glowing feedback. The reports are very positive. Jeanie Marshal currently produces high quality meals for private jets and cruises as well as other senior programs. This partnership will help us serve the rapidly growing number of seniors in the Bangor area.

Along with wonderful new menus, we will also offer more programming to our dining rooms. An important part of the Meals for ME program must include nutrition and health education, and activities that encourage people to people socialize.

It has been proven that these options improve the health of older persons. Staying home alone is often the fast track to depression and poor dietary habits, paving the way for chronic disease.

Don’t let that happen to you, get involved now.

We are planning many informational meetings in the next year that will inform you about the locations and the schedules of our many community dining rooms.

The following prediction is staggering: statistics show that in the next ten years the number of people age 65 and older will double in the region that we serve. Eastern Agency on Aging is committed to serve everyone who needs our services, and we will do whatever is necessary to make our programs to grow.

So please, join us for a meal. Or if possible, help us serve or deliver a meal. And by all means, if you are lucky enough to be financially comfortable, please share with those who are less fortunate.

Trust me when I tell you that there will never be enough federal and state money to serve the seniors of tomorrow. And even if there were, the restrictions would be vast.

As we develop our area plan for the state in 2008, we are looking to the residents of Eastern Maine to help us keep this valuable program on track.

If you have ideas, comments or suggestions, don’t hesitate to give me a call or drop me a line. We are here to serve you.